What is existing...
Is it living with meaning,
Having a purpose,
Or is it just breathing.
I feel as if my spirit is fleeting,
and all that's left is this empty vessel that I call a body.
Releasing carbon dioxide is the only thing that I do for the earth.
Just a waste of oxygen,
A pollution to the earth.
I feel as though I don' t exist.
The warm river that flows down my face is my only way of knowing,
I'm alive.
3 comments:
An interesting idea, well expressed, although the words "carbon dioxide" and "oxygen" do disrupt the scansion and seem out of place.
I used to write poetry, but I have only one example on my blog:
http://dennishodgson.blogspot.com/2009/11/silence-fragment.html
I don't know if it would be your cup of tea.
yea, you have a point, they do seem out of place. But thats kind of what the poem is about, so it was kind of my reasoning ... but maybe its a bit too abstract.And no, your poem is my cup of tea. well actually I dont like tea, but I guess thats beside the point. I really dont have a preference when it comes to poetry. I just love reading it and writing it, its beautiful.
I really REALLY like this poem. The half rhymes with "meaning/breathing" makes it sound delicate and thoughtful. My favourite out of all of yours xxx
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